Dear Short Answers >> I recently started a new job and one of my co-workers likes to take credit for everything I do and every idea I have. I've tried to make it clear to my boss that these are my ideas, but this guy is an expert at sucking up to the boss. I'm afraid that when raises and promotions are handed out I will be at the end of the line. Do I keep trying to get my well-deserved credit or do I just give up and look for another job?
DEAR G >> Unless your boss is a moron, he knows everything you know. Suck ups out themselves. Do your work and stop wasting energy on who gets credit.
A slippery slope
Dear Short Answers >> What happens if I don't get my car inspected?
DEAR AL >> If you don't get your car inspected, you will get stopped by a cop. When you get stopped by a cop, he might notice other things. If he notices other things, you will have to get a lawyer. When you get a lawyer, you know you are in trouble. When you know you are trouble, you start behaving recklessly. When you behave recklessly, your girl friend will leave you. When your girlfriend leaves you, you will feel very depressed. When you feel depressed you shut others out. When you shut others out you are very alone. Get your car inspected.
Dear Short Answers >> Why am I afraid to get married? Everyone else I know is finally doing it and my boyfriend would probably say "yes" if I asked him, but I am really afraid that all the good stuff we have together will disappear if we actually get married. Why can't we just have a baby? That seems scary, too, but not as much as marriage.
DEAR JUNO >> If good stuff disappears with marriage, why would it not disappear with a baby? Marriage and children are based on the same premise of long-term commitment.
In our view, without a long-term commitment babies and marriage are both pretty scary and likely to make good things disappear. In these times, marriage is not a prerequisite for children, but the commitment of both players is a good predictor of a reasonable outcome.
So what? You're right!
Dear Short Answers >> We go out with another couple to dinner — and after dinner, they take a napkin and truly blow their nose into it and lay it on the dish for the waitress to pick it up. It seems they do it all the time, especially the men. Yuck — that drives me to vomit. Who is right? I couldn't do it. Help me! Thank you!
— So Disgusted
DEAR SD >> Of course, you are right — it is disgusting. What to do? Perhaps a visible wince but probably nothing. Sorry.
What's love got to do with it?
Dear Short Answers >> I have lived with my boyfriend for almost a year. It has been an eye-opener and I'm not sure I like what I see. What used to look like "easy going," now looks like lazy. What used to look like "enjoying life," now looks like no discipline. But I love him. Help!
— Lady in Love
DEAR LIL >> Would you hire someone who is lazy and lacks discipline? No? Well it doesn't sound like a reco for life partner either. Face facts lady.
A good question
Dear Short Answers >> How is married life a sort of business?
— Just Starting Out
DEAR JUST STARTING >> Marriage is like a business in that you make deposits and withdrawals — of emotional energy, kindness and attention. There are times when one partner makes many withdrawals — just make sure you don't exceed your deposits.