NORTH ADAMS — So we've decided to start out 2016 with an armed insurrection of angry white guys, is that it?
If we had thought about it much, this wouldn't really be a surprise, would it? Maybe we might have missed the actual circumstances setting it off or the exact location, but the thought of white guys with guns staging a traitorous siege seems about right.
Key traitorous white guy Ammon Bundy is the son of Cliven Bundy, the Nevada rancher who pulled nearly the same stunt a couple years ago, so fury runs in his blood.
There are surely plenty of folks who think, well, at least he doesn't interrupt political rallies with screaming. At least he isn't all PC. At least he isn't some black kid waving a toy gun at cops in Cleveland, because we know that is the worst kind of threat there is.
As far as the Second Amendment goes, a toy gun is almost like mocking of the right to bear arms. Ammon Bundy is out there with real guns fighting the biggest enemy there is, America. Or, uh, the American government. You know, Obama.
It's hard to follow, but the important words are: White, Guns, Angry, Government and Fight Back. You get the basic gist with those.
It's all going to be OK, though. There's no way nutty white guys could gain any real power in our country. Elected office, I mean. Donald Trump is just a joke, right? That new political ad he put out, the one where he officially advocates for banning Muslim immigrants and building walls around our country, that's just something to laugh about, right?
And that wrestler from Pittsfield who roughed up a protester at the Trump rally? That's just crazy, weird behavior, right? The behavior seems like Nazi brown shirt style, but that's just liberals going too far, playing the Hitler card, right? Let's just stop it with all the over-the-top rhetoric and get back to making America great through open-carry laws.
That's OK, because the rest of us can are going to wrap ourselves around endless discussion about the new Star Wars movie while you're busy taking over the country. Was it Star Wars that was originally called the opium of the masses or has it just become that?
Actually, I'm just teasing Star Wars people. I totally get it. It is much easier to wrap your brain around a thing like that than the enormity of what's happening. And the people who support this new Trump world we live in are very, very loud, and it gets tiring to scream over their caterwaul. Plus when you scream, you're not actually saying anything. When you talk about Han Solo, you're at least doing it in a reasonable voice that allows some depth to the words actually being said.
So I get it. The small things. We can control the small things.
That's the philosophy of the college protests. Students are asking for a sweeping change of conscience within the confines of their own campus quads. These are tangible spaces that they can actually control, unlike the psychological space inhabited nationwide by angry white people, something you can't actually really see, let alone measure or really even qualify. You just know it's there and it sometimes manifests itself as lunatics like Trump or traitorous scum like Bundy.
Unfortunately, all that remains is for the left to remember that they, too, can own firearms and in some states, open carry to show-off their resistance to the fascists. Are we were headed that way? I hope not, but not all civil wars take place a long time ago and in a galaxy far, far away.