Brian Sullivan: No jive: it's about the fives
Kevin Garnett, Brooks Robinson and Joe DiMaggio. Oh yeah, and Nomar.
They are all synonymous with the No. 5 on their jerseys. I like the number five. It's fingers on a hand for those "five golden rings" in that Christmas song. It's toes on a foot. If you're a guy, then it's a shoe size too small. For a gal, it might be just right.
Five is way too many Whoppers to eat at one sitting. But Teo's hot dogs? Well, five just might be your culinary ticket. It's too many beers in one hour but not enough friends in one lifetime. Five is certainly not enough sports caps for me to own, but about four more ties than I ever use. And five is too many parking tickets and just a tad too many miles to drive before that next rest stop.
I don't think five is odd at all, even if it is bordered by four and six. Why is no one ever elected for five years? Governors and presidents are four, senators are six. Five? I don't know any, do you?
Five hours of sleep is not enough, but a five-day weekend is everything. Put two fives together and, well, in the old days I couldn't drive 55 either. So, let's play the over-under game with fives today and see if you think the way I do.
I've got the over-under on the tenure of the next Pittsfield High principal at five years. I'm taking the under. No disrespect intended, it's just the way the trend has been on the East Street campus in recent years. The new city superintendent? I'm taking the over. Not a tough pick. "Jake" McCandless is already inked up for five years as he readies to sail his ship out to sea.
The former Plunkett School on the corner of Fenn and First streets. I'm definitely taking the over. Five years from now I'm betting that it will look exactly as it does now, except five years older, if that's possible. The Plunkett name was huge in the 19th century history of Pittsfield. And like a lot of our early schools that were named after great people (Bartlett, Rice, Crane, etc.), I hate to see the Plunkett name vanish. I guess we'll always have Plunkett Street.
Still, I don't think the Normandy Invasion was given the attention that this proposed doughnut shop blueprint with the all-important drive-thru has been getting from city government. God help us that the day comes when we have to get out of our cars to get those cream-filled eclairs.
The over-under is five on the number of good-weather evenings we will have for our six Third Thursdays this year. I hope I'm wrong, but knowing the Berkshire weather patterns, I have to take the under. I figure we will get four great nights and a couple of rainouts. Again, I hope I'm wrong. Tonight's opener looks to be fine on the weather front.
Batter up, local baseball fans. The number of Pittsfield Sun games you should go to this year at Wahconah Park. I'm taking the over for you and me. So, let's all try and get there six times this season and root for this year's collegiate team. Besides, your Red Sox are fading quicker than a late-afternoon Berkshire rainstorm rainbow, so you won't be missing much at the Fens. Ouch!
I think it's a concert she did in Australia. Number of times I'll watch Tina Turner perform "Proud Mary" on YouTube. Definitely take the over, and that's just this week. I think she's 73 now. I couldn't move like she does now in 1973. A true legend who never played in the Berkshires, even in the early days with Ike. If I'm wrong, then let me know.
Is it me, or is it always election season around here? OK, number of new faces on the City Council after November. I'm going to say four, so I'm taking the under. But between those whom we know are leaving and those who haven't announced they're seeking re-election and those who are but might not win you know what? Give me the over instead.
Number of people who will like this idea? Take the over. Here's my thought. This year instead of putting out the Popcorn Wagon on the corner across from Park Square, how about putting the Popcorn Wagon out there AND SELLING POPCORN. There's an entire generation or two of Pittsfield pigeons who only know the stories told by their elders. Give them, and the rest of us, the real deal.
And finally, number of people reading today who remember the song "You Were on My Mind" by the We Five. I'm going to take the over.
OK, thanks for letting me give my 2 cents worth today. No, no, no. I mean my 5 cents worth. One last favor. Can you high-five me as I exit? Thanks.
Brian Sullivan can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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